Crafted by maker of geometric metal art Martin Taylor of Etsy shop Chromaforms, this Hanging Geometric Low Poly Shark Sculpture with LED Lights “transforms any space into a sea-scape.” Obviously, I must have one for my Back to the Future Enchantment Under the Sea Dance party that’s coming up.
Measuring 4′ long and around 18″ tall and wide, the shark is entirely cut and welded by Martin and illuminated via LEDs inside. It’s safe for hanging outdoors provided it’s covered and costs $3,500. For reference, you could probably buy an actual shark for that, but you’d have to be an evil villain and threaten to throw James Bond in its tank all the time, and then it becomes a whole thing.
I like the light shapes it casts on the walls too – it really does give the room an underwater vibe. You know this would look perfect in my basement tiki bar. I mean once I build it. Well, after I get permission from my wife to build it, then build it. After that though, it would definitely look great in there.
Because nothing says I’m eating like an astronaut like freeze-dried foods, this is the collection of freeze-dried candies available from Etsy shop Stellar Rabbit Foods. Available in Rainbow Puffs (Skittles), Worm Puffs (gummy worms), Mega Blasts (Starburst) and Tart Puffs (SweetTARTS) varieties, each 1-ounce bag costs $8 and is sure to put a smile on your face, and a cavity in that smile.
Just what does the freeze-drying process do to candy? Well according to the company, it “transforms once chewy candies into an airy, light, crunchy and melt in your mouth texture. The process of freeze-drying our candy intensifies the flavors making them even better than before! Take a moment and savor flavor before crunching down into them!” Yum! I think it goes without saying I just ordered a bag of each.
I remember when I was a kid I would eat a bar of chalky, freeze-dried ice cream and daydream about traveling among the stars. Now I’m afraid to travel higher than the third floor of any building and cry on Ferris wheels. Long story short, I’m not an astronaut.
When is a fish not a fish? When it’s a clown! Okay, a clownfish is still a fish, but I just thought that sounded good. For those of you living under a rock or who haven’t visited an aquarium or watched a Pixar movie, clownfish are those colorful little fish that are orange with white stripes. Now you can carry around a clownfish wherever you go, thanks to Krukru Studio, who makes a purse that looks just like Nemo.
The fishy purse measures about 17″ x 9″ and is available in felt, faux leather, or real leather, which I have on good authority are not what an actual clownfish is made of. Those are made entirely of love and pixie dust. Or is it Pixar dust? I digress. The clownfish purse is available on Krukru’s Etsy shop for $89 to $99 depending on the material you choose. That’s a whole lot more than it’ll cost you to buy a real clownfish, but this one is way bigger.
Now, all we need is a giant anemone purse for this purse to hang out inside of all day. Of course, that would likely poison its wearer, but that’s okay – the clownfish is immune to the anemone’s toxins.
Because some people’s idea of interior design is the Addams Family mansion, these are the Scary Reaching Wall Hands 3D printed and sold by Etsy shop 3DDeluxeStore. Available in black and white in four different styles, they’ll make the perfect coat racks at your next Halloween party. Granted I won’t need to use the coat rack because I’ll be wearing a superhero cape.
The hands cost $10 – $22 depending on the style chosen (ranging in size from a toddler-sized hand to one that’s larger than most adult hands), or you can get a set of all four for $65. Will I rip all the towel bars out of the walls in my bathroom and replace them with these? No, this is a rental property and I’d like to get my full security deposit back.
I am tempted to buy one, that way the next time my wife asks me to lend a hand with something around the house I can tell her it’s fine if she just borrows the one on the wall. I’ll have a good laugh about it, but that laugh will cost me my place in bed that night.
3D printed to resemble the Death Star II still under construction, Etsy shop StoryBrookBoutique is selling these Star Wars-inspired plastic planters. Available in 5 and 6-inch varieties ($16 and $24, respectively), one of these is going to look great on the window sill in front of my kitchen sink.
I like how the planter top isn’t perfectly circular, like the actual Death Star II while it’s being built. I think I’ll put a trailing plant in there and let it spill out over the edge and onto the window sill below. There’s no doubt in my mind it’s going to look great for about a month until the plant dies like so many did on Alderaan.
The mobile space station planters are available in traditional silver, or, my personal favorite – pink, which I can only assume is the color the Galactic Empire had in mind for its Death Stars before realizing how much all that paint was going to cost. Honestly, If I were Palpatine I would have done it anyway.
Are you always leaving the keys to your starship sitting around? The last thing you need is some rogue Ferengi getting their hands on them and trading your ship for a bunch of gold-pressed latinum. What you need is an official Starfleet key rack to keep your key ring from getting lost.
This $39 laser-cut wood key rack comes from Etsy seller NerdySwagger. The rack has five wooden starships and five docking bays that hold onto them. The 9.25″ x 13.25″ rack features an engraved United Federation of Planets Starfleet Command logo, along with a starbase designation in the upper right corner. By default, you get Orion Starbase, but you can get it personalized with your own words for an extra $10. I’d go with “All Your Base Are Belong to Us.”
When you think about it, does a Federation starship require keys to open its doors and start it up? I’m guessing by the 23rd century, we will have standardized biometric scanning for all of our authentication systems.
Furbies have always been a little creepy to me – perhaps it’s that I’ve seen what they look like on the inside that did it, or maybe it’s just their hypnotic eyeballs. Either way, they’re already pretty weird looking straight from the toy factory. But toy modder Plushie Couture thinks they can do better.
These guys make what they call “Oddbody” Furbies. In other words, these are toys with the faces of Furbies but grafted onto the bodies of other toys. If you liked Sid’s mutant toys from Toy Story, then these should be right up your alley. In fact, they made an Oddbody version of Woody, a Furby Woody if you will.
Other bizarro Oddbody mods include the Stay-Puft Marshmally Furby, the Lost in Space Furby Robot, Furby Barbie, and Furby Boombox among others. I recommend browsing the entire Plushie Couture Etsy shop to see what kind of Furby surgery they’ve been up to lately. Prices for the Oddbody Furbies start around $72.50, but that’s a small price to pay for something that’s sure to leave a long-lasting impression in your brain.
A USS Enterprise and Deep Space Nine themed cat tree: it’s what every Star Trek loving feline owner’s home has been missing. And now thanks to Etsy seller CE360designs, you can finally fill that void with a custom Star Trek Enterprise 1701D and DS9 Wood Cat Tower. You know they say good things come in small packages, but I imagine this box being on the larger side.
The 4-foot cat tree sells for $270 and has a USS Enterprise at the very top (with the option to be swapped for Voyager), with the Deep Space Nine space station below. The very bottom represents the two ends of a wormhole (with the option to be replaced with a Borg ship), all set atop the Starfleet insignia. According to the seller, “This is sure to make a conversation starter,” and I couldn’t agree more. I’m already talking about it and I don’t even own one.
Are your cats just as likely to play with the box the tree comes in as the tree itself? Knowing my cats, yes. I buy them all the latest cat toys but whenever I come home, there they are – chasing a piece of crumpled paper or torn cardboard. You know, with cats maybe it really is the simple things in life.
This is the life-size Uncle Fester Lamp created by Etsy seller ShrewdApe, based on Jackie Coogan’s Uncle Fester character from the 1964-1966 television series The Addams Family. Obviously, I very much need this staring at me from the dresser while I get ready for bed every night.
Using photo references, ShrewdApe first sculpted Uncle Fester’s likeness from clay, then made a plaster mold of that sculpture to cast the silicone skin you see here, which was placed over a foam core. He then painted the head and added eyelashes and custom made resin/epoxy eyeballs to finish the incredibly lifelike look. Although do you think it might be TOO good looking? I’m just really not trying to wake up in the middle of the night to discover my wife has run off with the lamp.
The only kicker? The piece costs $2,710. Which, the last time I checked my wallet full of dust bunnies, is a little bit outside my lamp budget at the moment. As much as I really do want it, if my chances of ever owning this lamp were a carnival game, that carnival would have left town a week ago and already be erecting its tents in another state.
[via This Is Why I’m Broke]
I’m at a point where I probably do 90% of my reading on some kind of digital device. But there are times it’s just nice to crack open a good old paperback. There’s just something that just feels right about flipping through actual pages rather than swiping on a touchscreen. Of course, when you read from an actual book, it’s easy to lose your place without a good bookmark. And no, you’re not allowed to dog-ear the corners. That’s sacrilege. Readers who are also gamers might want to pick up one of these fun bookmarks.
Connecticut artist LD Writes & Designs sells all kinds of bookmarks in her Etsy shop, including this pixelated “Save your progress?” design that’s perfect for gamers. It only ever points to “Yes,” which seems like it would be fine since you’re only going to use this when you’re actually saving your place. Each bookmark is made from die-cut cardstock that’s been laminated for durability, and so you can see through to the other side.
The bookmarks sell for just $5.25 each and can be ordered in a wide variety of colors. I say buy one to suit every mood. Something light and cheerful for your Hyperbole and a Half, and maybe something a bit darker for those times when you feel like reading that Edgar Allen Poe collection.
In addition to the “Save your progress?” bookmark, LD makes a version that simply says “PAUSE” along with a D-pad and game button cutouts, as well as a custom gamer’s bookmark that can have a name cut out of it.