Van Gogh’s The Starry Night: I remember the first time I saw it at the Museum of Modern Art (MoMA) in New York. I was the only one in the room at the time, and it was surreal: just me and one of the most famous paintings in the world. I still think about that often. Also: all the tasteful nudes I saw while I was there. But enough about my appreciation of fine art, LEGO has just announced a building set based on the famous piece.
The 2,316-piece set creates a plastic replica of the famous painting in a slightly 3D (it’s 5″ deep) plastic form, along with a frame and a small Van Gogh minifig. The finished build measures approximately 15″W x 12″H. For reference, the actual painting measures 2’5″ x 3′. It was much smaller than I anticipated when I first saw it. I don’t know why, but I imagined it would be like eight or ten feet wide.
The $170 set will be released on June 1st, and, just like the actual painting, I’ll have no choice but to admire it from afar since it’s out of my budget. Knowing me, I’ll probably try constructing my own version out of LEGO pieces I already have, and it’ll end up looking like some sort of unrecognizable abstract expressionist piece. My wife will not be thrilled when I ask her if we should hang it on the fridge.
A staple of gas stations when I was growing up, Slush Puppies are hands down one of the best beverages to drink if you want your mom constantly nagging that you’re going to rot all your teeth out. Available from FireBox, the $100 countertop Slush Puppie machine allegedly produces Slush Puppies just like you remember: insanely sweet and painfully cold.
The countertop Slush Puppie machine can produce a liter of slush every 15-25 minutes, with the option for a coarse or fine ice grain. Just add water, ice, salt, and Slush Puppie syrup (sold separately in 500mL bottles – enough to make 4 liters apiece), and you’re well on your way to a debilitating brain freeze! I… I can’t think straight!
FireBox reminds you that if you’re going to add alcohol to your Slush Puppie, you need to do so AFTER making it in the machine. Otherwise, the alcohol will prevent the mix from freezing properly since its freezing temperature is significantly colder than water. Of course, anybody like me who’s tried and failed to make alcohol freezy pops on spring break probably already knows that.
Inspired by the classic ‘see no evil, hear no evil, speak no evil’ wise-monkey sculptures, Regal Robot has reimagined the maxim with Jabba The Hutt’s Kowakian Monkey-Lizard Salacious B. Crumb sitting in for the monkeys. Just looking at him, I can practically hear him cackling at some unfortunate alien dropped into Jabba’s Rancor pit.
The $119 desk sculpture/paperweight is made of solid resin, weighs about a pound and is finished with a faux bronze patina. It’s kind of ironic if you think about it, though, because of all creatures, Salacious Crumb is probably the exact opposite of the embodiment of ‘see no evil, hear no evil, speak no evil.’ Practically all he does is see, hear, and speak evil!
Will one be adorning the desk in my home office? Probably not, but I don’t exactly make the galactic gangster money that Jabba The Hutt does. I can’t afford the finer things in life. Or even the less-fine things in life. Or, in this case, the extremely novel Star Wars products in life.
Dogs or cats – which makes the best pet? Depends on who and when you ask, but if you ask me on a day my dog pooped on the living room carpet, I’d probably say cats. Ask me on a day that my cat knocked a picture of my wife and me on our wedding day off a shelf and shattered the glass, I’d probably say dogs. But here to settle the debate once and for all comes this Dogs Vs Cats Chess Set available from Uncommon Goods.
The $179 set includes a folding wooden game board that doubles as a storage case for the pieces, and two sets of resin figures: one of dogs, the other of cats. Which would you choose to play as? I always choose the top hat, but that’s just me and chess makes my brain hurt; I’m more of a Monopoly kind of guy. Especially if I can be banker and steal money without getting caught.
I set up a chess board and tried to get my dog and cat to play a game to decide who was the better pet but my cat just swatted the pieces off the board, and my dog started chewing on them once they hit the floor. So who won? Definitely not me, that’s for sure. Maybe my fish will actually take the game seriously…
Because who doesn’t want to go out with a bang, Cremation Solutions has developed the Loved One Launcher – a hand cannon designed for spreading the ashes of a deceased loved one like they’re confetti at a New Year’s party. Honestly, I can think of worse ways to go. Not very many, mind you, but a few.
The $375 cannon is powered by two C02 cartridges and can launch ashes up to 75-feet in the air, perfect for raining back down on everyone in attendance, leaving them all to try to brush the remains of crazy Uncle Karl off their shoulders in a panic. It’s perfect.
But let’s say you don’t have any ashes to spread at the moment – can the Loved One Launcher be repurposed as a t-shirt cannon? I’m asking for a funeral parlor/half-time show company I’m thinking about starting. I’ve already got the giant skeleton mascot costume.
3D printed by Etsy shop NerdyBathroomFun (accurate), this LEGO-inspired Deadpool (Deadpoop?) holds a roll of toilet paper on his katana to help clean up the mess after the chimichanga party you just had in your stomach. Pretty cool, but I feel like he should also be able to hold a bottle of Pepto-Bismol as well. And maybe a candle.
Deadpool can be affixed to a wall with mounting screws or lag bolts or attached to an optional wall mount using 3M adhesive strips. Either way, I can guarantee he’s not going to be thrilled about hanging out in the bathroom with me after a visit to an all-you-can-eat buffet, especially if it was Tex-Mex night.
Is my wife going to appreciate the newest addition to our bathroom? Probably not. But since when has she ever appreciated anything cool? I mean, she married me, didn’t she? The truth hurts; it really does.
These unique crash helmets are decorated in the style of a disco ball, handmade and sold by Etsy shop Disco2Disco. Each helmet features a retractable visor and is not VDOT approved for road wear. That’s a shame too, because how else are you supposed to let other motorists know you’re the life of the highway party?
Available in all silver, a combination of silver with some rose gold, or all rose gold, the helmets are available in sizes S – XL and cost around $200. A small price to pay to instantly be the center of attention for any gathering you attend (or crash), particularly any weddings or funerals.
Now it just needs an integrated sound system and orbiting spotlight and you’re a human disco party! And who hasn’t dreamed of being a mobile disco party on two feet? I know as a kid it’s what I always dreamed about being when I grew up. That or a dinosaur.
Presumably a little drunk and inspired by how comfortable a dog bed looked at the time, University of British Columbia students Noah Silverman and Yuki Kinoshita developed the Plufl, a giant dog-style bed intended for human use. Alternatively, just buy an x-large dog bed and curl up in that. Just don’t be surprised if the cat beats you to it and swats at you whenever you come near.
The $399 Plufl is currently an already funded Kickstarter project, and Noah and Yuki say they engineered the bed “to provide the optimal napping experience” and “maximize comfort and foster a sense of security, delivering relief for those who have ADHD, stress, and anxiety-related issues.” I’m pretty sure that covers everybody. Like a security blanket… in a dog bed. See how I tied all that together? I didn’t briefly consider going to journalism school for nothing.
Admittedly, it does look comfy – but $400? That’s an awful lot of money just to constantly try to explain to my dog that the dog bed that looks like it’s for her is actually for me. Eventually, I’ll give up because she’s just too cute and return to sleeping on the sofa while she sleeps in my Plufl – probably with my pillow too.
Designed and manufactured by Fred, the BUFF BABY line of products appear to be exercise equipment designed for newborns. Of course, they only look like that, with the Speed Punching Bag (affiliate link) actually being a crinkle-filled cradle toy, and the dumbbell a toy rattle. Great, I wish I’d read that before buying them, now how am I supposed to train my baby for the ultra-featherweight title?
The Speed Punching Bag clips to the handle of a baby carrier so your child can attempt to punch it, building their much-needed hand-eye coordination. Of course, the way the loop connects so loosely, it looks like it’s going to spend most of its time fallen to the side of the handle while your baby screams because their punching bag just disappeared.
Even if the BUFF BABY line isn’t actual exercise equipment, it doesn’t mean they won’t help your child pursue bodybuilding or boxing by planting the seed in their impressionable little minds. Take me for instance: my parents showered me with all sorts of outer space toys when I was a kid, and I grew up to be an astronaut. And by astronaut, I mean huge Star Trek fan. Close enough.
Because dreams really do come true, and that means nightmares as well, engineer Chad Etzel went and built the unholy Furbtroller: an Xbox controller modded using Furby body parts, including eyeballs and mouth for joysticks. I only hope by the time you’re reading this that it’s already been cleansed with fire and wiped from the earth.
Chad says he was originally inspired to build the controller after fellow gamer Ben Bayliss made a rendering of a Furby-themed Xbox controller (seen above), and decided to take that inspiration to the next logical step. That step being the abomination you see here. Never before have I wished the internet axiom ‘What Has Been Seen, Cannot Be Unseen’ wasn’t so true.
Could you even imagine trying to actually play a video game with this nightmare? Forget about beating a boss in Elden Ring, I’d be more concerned with destroying the monster in my hands. I’ll be honest – I’m seriously considering starting a Patreon for Chad and contributing if he promises not to make any more controllers in the future.