Author Archives: Jack Kieffer

Thanksgiving Dinner in Cupcake Form: No More Undercooked Turkey!

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People everywhere are having to cook a delicious meal for a bunch of greedy mouths this upcoming Thanksgiving, but don’t crack under the pressure. Don’t crack, friends, because you don’t need to hold all of that weight yourselves – I have a couple of tips to give! (Also, you’re not an egg, no matter what your body shape may tell you.) The first is to tell all of your relatives that they should arrive at a time that is two hours before the actual time. This way, they are obligated to help you cook! The second is to just buy some Boston Market and then deem it homemade.

These Thanksgiving Dinner Cupcakes are another perfect way to shirk your duties, if you’re lazy like I am, but they’re also a perfect addition to any hard-planned Thanksgiving meal. As most of us know, dessert is the most important part anyway. That’s why I just eat it first and second.

These cupcakes look delicious on several different levels – sweet potato cupcakes? AM I IN HEAVEN? There’s a wonderful tutorial available on Make.Bake.Celebrate, the home of food geniuses, but you don’t need to look at that. Just have someone else make them so that you can act as the professional “food tester.” You know, just to make sure they’re not poisoned. WHAT IF THEY POISONED THEM IN BETWEEN BITES? I guess I’ll just have to eat all of them to make sure.

These cupcakes are great, but there are definitely more to be found, since you can never have enough of this wonderful creation. Check out the Frankenweenie Cupcakes and the Fried Cupcake Nuggets, which make me drool all over myself.

[via Instructables via That's Nerdalicious]

Jack Kieffer owns Cool Gizmo Toys, a blog for geeks, their friends, and their friends’ friends.


Movember Must: Man’s Face Stuff Mustache Wax

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It’s that special month again, ladies and gentlemen. It’s the month that brings joy to all of those who are able to grow facial hair (and jungles under their pits for the children to play in.) You *who are of at least average intelligence* guessed it! No Shave November, which is informally known as Noshember, and incorrectly known as feminine.

The Man’s Face Stuff Mustache Wax is something that all of us males (and bearded women) should be thinking about purchasing, as it provides a couple of important benefits.

The first of the aforementioned important benefits is what I like to call “shaping.” One does not simply have their mustache situated in any which way, one must shape their mustache to their liking. You can go with the Biker, the Confucius, or really any other design that fits your manliness.

The second of the aforementioned benefits is a delicious smell that will surely lure in women like peanut butter lures a golden retriever. They’ve got Gin and Tonic, Red Hot Cinnamon, All Nighter (whatever that means), and more!

If you want to go and pick yourself up some No Shave Movember man-wax like a real man, then jump on over to the generally unmanly Etsy – they’re only $9 a pop. If not, then you’ll probably want to check out the Welder K24 Manly Watch and this un-Godly combination of Bane and Batman, which, surprisingly, is also on Etsy. I like where this site is going, friends, since I already wasted too much money on quilted pillows. “What?” Nothing.

Jack Kieffer owns Cool Gizmo Toys, a site where geeks go to do awesome things and then pass out on my fancy futons.

[via Uncrate]


Creeper Coffee Mug Is Oddly Square and Oddly Satisfying

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Creepers always ruin your hard-earned progress in Minecraft, and it’s time to take revenge.  Don’t be a cotton-headed ninnymuggins, get the Creeper Coffee Mug, which has the face of your (least) favorite Minecraft monster printed on its side.  Whether you enjoy jumping up in fear whenever you look at your coffee mug or if you plant to take a sledgehammer to the thing, everyone at work will appreciate your sense of style, and it’s not because of the skinny tie your wearing.  “But everyone said they liked my skinny tie!”  They also said you looked like Jabba The Hutt when you dressed up as the green lantern last Halloween.

void0

As you can see, the Creeper mug isn’t your typical coffee mug, but it is your typical “captured a Creeper and DRILLED A HOLE THROUGH ITS SKULL TO CREATE A RESERVOIR FOR MY COFFEE.”  While that may be a little harsh at the moment, next time you strike diamond and then get destroyed by a Creeper, revisit your thinking and make another judgement.

You can pick up this wonderfully geeky coffee mug for about $21(USD) in about 3-4 weeks, but you can pre-order it now to ensure your satisfaction in the future.  Not everything involves instant gratification, you know, and patience is a bird-chew.  “Is it?  Is it a bird-chew?”  I believe it is, my friend, I believe it is.  Cleaned it off my windshield yesterday.

If you’re looking for some more Minecraft fun, check out the Periodic Table of Minecraft and the Real Life Minecraft Blocks if you’re cool enough.

[via: That's Nerdalicious]

This super awesome post was written by Jack, lead blogger at Cool Gizmo Toys, a great place for geeky stuff.


Portal Turret Gas Mask Will Violently Filter Your Breathing Air

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Nowadays, kids are into violence.  Guns, explosions, fist fights – you can’t deny that these have all become an integral part of the gaming experience.  Borderlands 2?  Violent.  Halo 4?  Violent.  All 50 million versions of the same game?  (CoD.)  Violent.

Portal is one of the more docile games in terms of getting injured, but we’ve taken one small part of that experience and focused on it in all kinds of different creations. Which part is that, you ask?  The part that shoots things, of couse – the turret from Portal!  One minute it’s your friend, the next it’s stabbing you in the back.  With bullets.  Still recovering emotionally from Wheatley’s betrayal.

portal gas mask sick 1

A guy by the name of TwoHornsUnited, who understands the concept of two objects being stronger than a single object, has created this awesome tribute to Portal.  No, I don’t think it will actually protect you from noxious gas, but it sure as heck will make the neighbors pee their pants when I crawl in through the window holding my Portal gun replica.

portal gas mask sick 2b

Here’s what the mask looks like from the view of the fifty foot woman.  You know – did anyone ever try to reason with that lumbering creature of a woman?  “Are you talking about my wife again?”  HAHA – I’m going to tell on you like I used to in grade school when you’d flick boogers at Jenny.  “So you weren’t talking about my wife?”  No – we already came to the consensus that she looks like that bear Matthew Inman drew.

If you like the Portal Turret Gas Mask, then you’ll definitely want to check out the Portal Webcam.  ”Not really, actually.”  I’m not a mind-reader, you intellectual potato.  Go take a look at the LEGO Portal set while I wallow in my self-pity, which gives off an odd stench.

Jack Kieffer owns Cool Gizmo Toys, a site that has a bunch of geeky stuff on it.


Assassin’s Creed Kenway Jacket For All Of Your Parkour Needs

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Working on your parkour skills?  Going over to the local playground and kangaroo kicking kids off of the monkey bars?  Flying down the slide face first into a diving roll faceplant?

If so, you and me aren’t so different after all.  The thing is, these failed stunt attempts feel much more awesome when you’re sporting a jacket that looks like the one himself Ezio would wear!  Check this out – there’s no way you can resist putting this on your Christmas list!  And this year, we’re finding Santa and giving it to him.  Personally.

assassins creed jacket 1

The Asssassin’s Creed Jacket is modeled after the one that Connor Kenway’s going to wear in the newest Assassin’s Creed title.  It was designed by Volante Designs, and you can buy it for $320.  Well, actually, he’s had a gigantic influx of orders due to the media attention, and you have three options.  One: whip out the sewing machine and make one yourself.  Two: pay extra and get one of the first jackets.  Three:  fill out an order form and wait an un-specified period of time while he hires more employees to increase production speeds.

You can get this jacket in any color combination you want, but I would probably just go with the classic red and white.  Scratch that - neon green is my favorite.

assassins creed jacket 4

This is undoubtedly the most awesome jacket I have ever seen, and it is a must have for any serious Assassin’s Creed fan!  Let’s be honest – dressing up like an assassin may be a way to get the whole subdivision to think you’re a freak, but it’s a great way to get in shape and show off your geeky tastes at the same time!  And that’s rare, since my geeky tastes usually just involve bacon.

If you’re not willing to fork out the cash and pick up one of these, then you should take a look at some other awesome Assassin’s Creed stuff!  Take this Hidden Blade Gauntlet Replica, for example, or this Assassin’s Creed Tomahawk Replica!  Both of which are dangerous, but we all know that it’s all fun and games until someone gets hurt – then it’s run from the police and blame Todd.  “Seriously, bro?  Pinning it on me?”

[via Geekologie]


Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Drawn as Jedi Knights: Magical Mashup Fun

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The Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles are pretty fearsome, even if they are pizza-eating slobs who live in the sewers.  (Read: unwanted outcasts of society.)  Combine this level of fierce physical ability with the disciplined battle techniques of Jedi Knights, and what do you get?  Nothing, since you lack artistic skill and can’t pick up a pencil because of those acrylic nails.  If you happen to be as talented as Q-Dog2099, you get these awesome Teenage Mutant Jedi Turtles!

raphael tmnt jedi

Raphael’s my favorite Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle Jedi mashup, probably because of the dual-wielding aspect that transferred over.  Step aside, Darth Maul – two blades with two hilts are always better than one hilt with two really long blades.  Both of which should always be worse than a rocket launcher, but apparently that’s not the case.  Battlefronts one and two?  Most assuredly not the case.

leonardo tmnt jedi

The blue glow that’s been applied to Leonardo is one of my favorite colors of blue, in case you weren’t wondering.  I love imposing my unwanted opinions upon others.  Did you know that maltese-poodle dogs are the best kind?  Well now you do.

donatello tmnt jedi

I always identified with Donatello, since we’re pretty similar, me and him.  Both of us are of above average intelligence, endowed with good looks, and glowing in a purple aura.  The last one may or may not be because I fell into a pool of radioactive material last week when I was fishing at the local pond.  My quest: to pull out the four-armed fish of legend.  “Wouldn’t it be just as impressive to find a fish with one arm?”   Beggars can’t be choosers.

michaelangelo tmnt jedi

I hope you agree with me when I say that this really is an awesome collection of Star Wars/TMNT mashups.  Now… I know what you’re all thinking.  ”Why am I reading this instead of that post about the D-Cup TMNT Bra?”  The answer?  I have no idea.  If you’re not as risqué as I had taken you to be at a prior time, then you’ll want to check out the more moderate Arcade Mashup Prints, which are pretty cool too, but less sexy.

This super awesome post was written by Jack, lead blogger at Cool Gizmo Toys.  Jack puts together lists to help geeks quickly find the stuff that they love, and probably has several endangered species of lemur living illegally in his war shelter, but that’s irrelevant.


Cupcake Nuggets Are Fried Up For Your Enjoyment: Get The Recipe

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Cupcakes have been an obsession of food connoisseurs everywhere for years, and we’ve seen some weird creations thus far.  The Cupcake Nuggets?  Extremely original - no sarcasm.  Savor this moment, friends, because my posts are generally dripping in sarcasm, and my fried chicken wings are always dripping in grease.  If you can’t make transparent spots in a pile of napkins, you’re not doing it right.

Cupcake Project is the mastermind / evil scientist behind this wonderful creation.  I just have one question: is the world prepared to handle this kind of treat and the power that lives within it?  Said power: 10,000,000 calories that go straight to your sexy love handles and turn them into (still sexy) love safety bars.

cupcake nuggets 1

So, they look delicious, but what exactly are Cupcake Nuggets?  Prepare to have your collective mind blown, friends, because this is a little bit of cupcake-ception and a whole lot of fried oil.  Each Cupcake Nugget is a carefully crafted piece of cupcake which has been breaded with cupcakes and then deep fried in a vat of goodness.  Yes, they were designed to look like chicken nuggets, but I can assure you that they taste like the world’s favorite snack.  (Which is cupcakes, according to the same statistician who said that his cologne works every time sixty percent of the time.)

cupcake nuggets 2a

The special sauce pictured above is meant to look like barbecue sauce, but it’s actually raspberry jam!  (The baker had almost as much fun trying to stick to the chicken nuggets theme as I did launching pennies at the children playing in the snow, but that’s a story for a different time.)

I have been told that the Cupcake Nuggets taste like donuts with a crispy exterior, but surely you’ll want to grab the recipe and experience the slices of heaven for yourself!  If you’re not ambitious enough to try making these treats, then I’d recommend you hop on over to the Cupcakewurst Cupcake-Filled Sausage or the Ned Stark Cake Pops if you’re a Game of Thrones fan like me.  Tyrion Lannister for President 2012.

[via: That's Nerdalicious]

This super awesome post was written by Jack, lead blogger at Cool Gizmo Toys.  Jack puts together lists to help geeks quickly find the stuff that they love, and has a free eBook that you can get today!


Pokemon Characters Turned into Freaky Tim Burton Creations

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You all know Tim Burton as the only man on planet earth who can make an animated nine year-old child give a grown man nightmares.  (Yes, I’m talking about Frankenweenie.)  On an unrelated note, you probably also know a man named M. Night Shyamalan, who is the only guy who can put a (un-satisfying) twist ending into every single one of his movies.  Anyone see that movie Devil?  SPOILER: It was the old lady, who died almost halfway through the movie.

So sit back, relax, and enjoy these Pokemon characters drawn like Tim Burton would have imagined them.

These were done by a Tumblr guy named Hat Boy, who is currently drawing Pidgey in the style of Tim Burton.  (He’s just going in numerical order.)  The above is a rather mutated, frustrated Venusaur that the frightful person himself would approve of.  I’ll tell you what, though: if that came ouf of a Pokeball, I think you could win most battles by default.

This Tim Burton-like representation of Charmeleon is one of my favorites that HatBoy has created.  Why?  It reminds me of the two little guys from the Hercules Disney movie.  It also reminds me to plug in my nightlight, since I am now afraid of what I may find under my bed.  Hint: my bum brother-in-law wielding a pack of opened matches.

Here’s our little buddy Squirtle, complete with creepy dot nostrils characteristic of Tim Burton characters.  I’m done giving myself the heebie-jeebies, so you should probably go check out something else weird like the Q*bert Pillow.  Or, if you’re drawn more to the Pokemon side of things, take a look at these custom Pokemon onesies.  For adults.

[via Venture Beat]

This super awesome post was written by Jack, lead blogger at Cool Gizmo Toys.  Jack puts together lists to help geeks quickly find the stuff that they love, and has a free eBook that you can get today!